Born Leaders of Men

  Tuckerton Tamerlane Morey Mahosh
    Is a statesman of world-wide fame,
  With a notable knack at rhetorical bosh
    To glorify somebody’s name⁠—
Somebody chosen by Tuckerton’s masters
To succor the country from divers disasters
    Portentous to Mr. Mahosh.

  Percy O’Halloran Tarpy Cabee
    Is in the political swim.
  He cares not a button for men, not he:
    Great principles captivate him⁠—
Principles cleverly cut out and fitted
To Percy’s capacity, duly admitted
    And fought for by Mr. Cabee.

  Drusus Tum Swinnerton Porfer Fitzurse
    Holds office the most of his life.
  For men nor for principles cares he a curse
    But much for his neighbor’s wife.
The Ship of State leaks, but he doesn’t pump any⁠—
Messrs. Mahosh, Cabee & Company
    Pump for good Mr. Fitzurse.